UNTITLED ON PURPOSE

 


At the free clinic, for hepatitis.
I kicked ass too. I got an A, two B's and a C. 

It's 3:11am.
My teeth hurt like bastards so I can't sleep. I need to sleep because I have to go to work in the morning. But these teeth!
How could anyone sleep with the feeling of having half your face chewed off by a bulldog?
I've smoked some pot and now have some mixture of Sprite and Rum preceeded by a Rum and Mint Tea.
I don't smoke pot or drink so I got a strange urge for blogger.
An urge that passed as soon as I began typing.

Today I woke up and did activities with my girlfriend.
Then I went to the bank and deposited three $5 checks from Pincone Research.
Then I walked to the MAX station at Pioneer Square.
I had a few minutes before the train came to take me to work so I went into the Rite Aid and bought a 20oz Diet Coca-Cola and four boxes of Hot Pockets.
I boarded the train headed for Beaverton and arrived at my stop at 1:50pm and walked to work.
I work at Stream International.
After arriving at work I have been sitting here at my desk doing nothing important.
I've just been looking at shit on YTMND and listening to my Les Savy Fav mix CD.

I can't really document my entire day yet because it is only a quarter till 8pm but, I'm fairly certain it will turn out like any other day before and countless days to come.

Here's a picture to distract us.




Seacrest Out

Before you start getting pissed off or comparing me to Steve Buscemi let me say that I have been a server a few times. I know how hard it is and I know how appreciated tips are.
But you know what? I was a server in Louisiana where the wages earned are $2.13 per hour.
Now I live in Oregon where servers make minimum wage, which happens to be $7.50 per hour. If you're a server in Oregon then you will bring home, on a bad day, $60 in wages and $20 tips for a total of $80. While I, on the other hand, am making only $76 a day.
$80 is a very conservative figure. That assumes they only made $20 tips that day. A server can bring home upwards of $300 in tips in one night in certain restaurants.
But we'll take the meagerest of estimates and go with $80.

My next step involves a mathematical equation so I'll try to go slow.

$80 > $76

I'M NOT TIPPING YOUR RICH ASS

So, I think I've figured out the secret plan.
In my job we are supposed to be reviewing text advertisements and approving or rejecting them but, there are very few ads. In the past week I've only done six ads and that is not a whole lot at all! (You can do one ad in like 3 minutes tops sometimes. It's actually more accurate to count how many keywords i've gone over since some ads have thousands of them and some ads have like one but whatever this thing is going on too long and I don't think you're allowed to have over a certain character limit inside parenthesis.)
Anyway, they let us surf the internet when we don't have ads, which is usually all damn day. The trick is they don't allow certain things; porn is forbidden because we are at work (duh) and they don't allow streaming audio or video because they say it takes up too much bandwidth. I can understand these two but the other things are a bit more fishy. We can't check Myspace (not that I'm crying about it, it's just a rule) and we can't play flash games or chat or even write in blogs. I am breaking that last rule right now, sshhhh.
So, basically my hypothesis is this.
This is all an experiment. The ideas is that the internet has a much grander use than what it is most commonly being used for so, they take away the biggest distractions (porn, audio, video, MySpace, flash games, chatting) to find out what we do with this wonderful tool.
I think the outcome of our work will be very important but, I'll never contribute to the answer if I keep breaking the rules and writing in this blog and chatting with my friends on my Gmail account.
Back to work!

OUR FATHER WHO ART IN HEAEVN HALOW3D B THY NMA!!!1! OMG WTF LOL THY KNGDOM COME11!111 LOL THY WIL B DON3 ON EARTH AS IT IS IN HAAEVN!!!!!!! OMG WTF GIEV US THIS DAY OUR DALEY BREAD1!1!! AND FORGIEV US OUR TR3SPASES AS WE FORGIEV THOSA WHO TR3SPAS AGANEST US11!!11! OMG WTF AND LAAD US NOT IN2 TEMPTATION BUT DELIEVR US FROM AVIL11!11!1! FOR THIEN IS DA KNGDOM AND TEH POW3R AND DA GLORY FOR EVAR AND EVAR!111!1 OMG LOL MEN!11! OMG WTF

That's my oldest little brother and his pregnant wife and his very pregnant beard.

In the near future people will have the option to choose certain small characteristics for their children based on our knowledge of the human genome.

Our techniques will improve with time because we will have more experience in the field.

Only rich people can afford this for their children.

Then the next generation of genetic manipulators will improve intelligence, possibly by figuring out a way to increase the size and surface area of the neocortex without having to be hindered by the birth canal of the mother.

Rich people will have awesome children.

Kinda like some shitty movie by friend saw and said was "okay". Sounds like Galaga. Gattica?

Over time, methods will improve but will still be expensive. A whole group of people will be enhanced, hyper-evolved through artificial selection and almost a completely different species from your average everyday middle class population.

The technology now isn't that hard or expensive, but we keep the lower class species of human around for menial labor and entertainment.

People like you are funny looking now, like monkeys riding bicycles and smoking cigarettes.

There are a couple of the advanced guys who recognize the injustice and want to help the lower class attain everything that they have now.

So they go and steal a time machine, which was invented about a decade prior but outlawed by the world legislature because time machines would totally fuck with everything, especially those in power.

Or something like that, shutup.

They go back in time and try to implant genetic boosters in people of the lower to middle class. The ancestors of the ones they are trying to help.

That's why backwoods hicks and lower class rednecks of today always report being abducted by aliens and probed.



Time Machine




Future Dude




Redneck





Wakka Wakka Wakka

That's when it hit me.

"I'll make a pointless blog post! That will dispel my boredom for almost 15 seconds!"

For the real instigator, check out this dude.

I got a job.

I’m fairly positive that everyone who is reading this has become frustrated at times with the apparant inability a lot of people have reconciling hard facts with their steadfast belief system. A lot of people are brought up and taught the biblical creation story from Genesis and continue to hold these beliefs for the rest of their grown lives. The overwhelming evidence of the obvious facts never quite break through that.

Okay, people, I know it’s hard but, YOU’VE GOTTA STOP TRYING TO KILL SCIENCE SO YOU CAN FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR BELIEFS!

Instead of asking “What would Jesus do?” people should be asking “What would Kepler do?”



Johannes Kepler was raised in an extremely superstitious time (1570-1630) and was, like most others, enamored with the idea of God’s perfect creation of the universe. He was obsessed with trying to make his beliefs fit into a scientific model. He wholeheartedly believed that God had designed and created the universe and orchestrated the solar system based on his perfect solids model. He tried for years to get his model to work based on current observations about the solar system and after failing was finally convinced that it was the accepted observations that were flawed and not his model. His belief system almost triumphed over science.

Where Kepler differs from the rest of today’s willfully ignorant is that, no matter how much it anguished him, he could not ultimately ignore measurable fact. No matter how much he really wanted his beliefs to be true, they simply were not and he knew it. After finally abandoning his notions about God’s perfect solids model for the solar system, Kepler was able to use the astronomical observations of Tycho Brahe to come up with the three basic laws of planetary motion that is the basis of all we know about how planets move. It was even the base work that Isaac Newton used when building his three laws of motion and universal gravitation.

This little rant is more than just trying to suck Kepler’s dick though. It’s an example of the kind of scientific breakthroughs that can happen when the shackles of religious beliefs are not allowed to hinder critical thought and observation skills.

Alright I guess that’s about it.



Gettin back to work now.

jump ahead, blah blah blah
got kicked out
blah blah blah
lost my job
etc., etc.
said "fuck it"
yadda yadda yadda
moved to Portland

stayed in a hostel for a week
that was cool

met some people
most of them were cool

got an apartment

now I'm looking for a job

but man, all these people,

it's making it fun to be an amateur philosopher

The inevitable has happened. Francisco has gotten us kicked out of our apartment.
Of course, I'm not surprised.
I've warned him multiple times that if he can't keep his shit together when he's drunk he's going to get us kicked out and after the New Years night fiasco it finally happened.
Fran and his girlfriend came home TRASHED and stomped the whole way up the stairs. And after his girlfriend threw herself into my bed, with my naked ass comfortably inside, Fran just lost his shit entirely. He ripped the door off the hinges and yelled and screamed and stomped around for an indeterminate number of hours. This wouldn't be overreaction except that I was underneath the covers and she just fell down onto my bed from being so wasted. She was doing the typical drunk person thing where you tell the other people where you went and exactly what you drank and say "fuckin'" a lot.
Anyway, I knew this was going to happen at some point. I just figured we would get at least one more noise violation notice before being evicted.

Well, at least now I know that my insecuritites about the stability of my life weren't unfounded. Maybe I'm not so crazy afterall.