Friday, April 28, 2006

Some things you may not have known.

Posted by Lucas Green

In the near future people will have the option to choose certain small characteristics for their children based on our knowledge of the human genome.

Our techniques will improve with time because we will have more experience in the field.

Only rich people can afford this for their children.

Then the next generation of genetic manipulators will improve intelligence, possibly by figuring out a way to increase the size and surface area of the neocortex without having to be hindered by the birth canal of the mother.

Rich people will have awesome children.

Kinda like some shitty movie by friend saw and said was "okay". Sounds like Galaga. Gattica?

Over time, methods will improve but will still be expensive. A whole group of people will be enhanced, hyper-evolved through artificial selection and almost a completely different species from your average everyday middle class population.

The technology now isn't that hard or expensive, but we keep the lower class species of human around for menial labor and entertainment.

People like you are funny looking now, like monkeys riding bicycles and smoking cigarettes.

There are a couple of the advanced guys who recognize the injustice and want to help the lower class attain everything that they have now.

So they go and steal a time machine, which was invented about a decade prior but outlawed by the world legislature because time machines would totally fuck with everything, especially those in power.

Or something like that, shutup.

They go back in time and try to implant genetic boosters in people of the lower to middle class. The ancestors of the ones they are trying to help.

That's why backwoods hicks and lower class rednecks of today always report being abducted by aliens and probed.



Time Machine




Future Dude




Redneck





Wakka Wakka Wakka

3 comments:

. said...

the rednecks will interbreed with the future chicks and dudes?

cuz...that's totally hot.

Hasphat said...

It all makes sense now...

Hasphat said...

hahahaha, wakka wakka wakka